Are you okay Mommy???

Hahaha. I laugh just thinking about the story I am about to tell you. It comes with a warning....do not do what I do, but what I say!

So CJ comes home the other week on a Friday before Christmas and says that Todd (his boss) is expecting for the whole family to be at a Christmas parade and ride around with the Chick-fil-a cow the next night. It was a neighborhood parade for a local neighborhood and I thought it would be a great idea...especially throwing candy and all of the cool homemade floats in a night parade. Well we get the gang there, (we picked up the employee who was going to be the cow and he rode with us to the neighborhood), ate pizza in the car, and it began to rain. Nothing bad but it was really cold and now it was drizzling. yea! The guys started dressing the cow, guys being CJ and Todd, and AnnMarie started having a fit. All of a sudden the guy who rode with us in the van was slowly disappearing. Poor kid. So we had to have her as far away from the cow as humanly possible, which meant inside the truck where Todd's wife, Karen was driving. With the heat on rather then the rain and cold....Can't say I was complaining. Anyone who knows me knows I am soooo cold natured! So we start with the parade and loop around and we think, well theres where we started, are we done? We have taken one hour already...surely we're done right? Of coarse, we aren't, we are just going to the other side of the neighborhood now. So about ten minutes pass by and AnnMarie tells me she has to use the bathroom. Keep in mind that we are in a slowly moving truck at the rate of about 5 mph in a neighborhood where no one knows anyone and AnnMarie is in my lap. Well I asked her to told it like any good mother would do and she said ok. about Five more minutes and she says she has to go again. I again asked her to wait and she said she could not. At this point I am perpelexed. What do I do? Ask my husbands boss to stop the truck so I can ask a complete stranger to use their bathroom and I'll catch up later??? Ask my two year old to keep holding it until goodness knows when because we have no idea where we are??? As I am pondering what to do I suddenly have this nice warming sensation come over my lap. I quietly ask AM if she has used the potty and she is dead silent. Of course she has....in my husbands BOSSES truck....agghhhhh. Poor child couldn't help it but I was mortified. So I had to tell Karen and she said not to worry about it. We continued the parade route (another 30 mins by the way) and when we got back to our car I had to tell CJ what happened. As they undressed the cow I was anxious to get us both home so that we could clean ourselves up. Not to mention that I am slightly chilled at this point as I can imagine AM is too. We return to Chickfila and drop of the employee and then I proceed to drive the van and CJ gets in his truck to come home. I wish I could draw a diagram of this but I am not that talented so you will have to handle a description. The only thing that seperates our home from CFA is a major highway and a parking lot. (a large one but a parking lot none the less). Think of the distance as a triangle and the two closest points 1)CFA, 2)our home. The line between these two is the parking lot. the other point in the triangle is a red light. the line from our home to the red light is one highway and the line from the red light to CFA is another highway. There is no more then 3/4 of a mile if you go from point 1 to 3 to 2. With that in mind I can finish the story.

So CJ is following behind me and I turn onto the highway and get ready to turn at the light to come home. I turn onto our street and admire the lights of our next door neighbor (remember this is Christmas). But then I notice an unusual color light and look back as I turn into our drive way to make sure that Todd's lights didn't just blow up (our neighbor is Todd too....very confusing). On no, it is a police officer behind CJ. I thought to myself, wow, did CJ just get pulled over? As the cop went around CJ I thought WHEW, glad we avoided that one. (Please keep in mind I am in MY DRIVEWAY!!!!!!) The cop comes around CJ and pulls into our driveway behind me...lights and all. I am like are you serious? I know I wasn't speeding, how could I? I only drove 3/4 of a mile! The first thought I always think of is am I buckled, but to this one I said, I have been sitting in my driveway for 10 secs. I have a right to not be buckled. The cop comes up to my window and asks for my license, reg and ins card. And asks if I know why I have been pulled over to which I probably gave the meanest look and said no. He said I wasn't buckled. Which I wasn't but that was all....no speed, no improper lane change, not using signals, nothing. just no seat belt. well....I am totally flabergasted because I am in my own driveway with blue lights and my children are totally confused. I asked the officer if they could go in and the officer said my husband could take them in. AM asked me if I was coming too and the OFFICER told AM that her mommy would be in shortly. How bad is that???? While I am sitting in the van is disbelief with pee all over my pants and waiting on my ticket to be written my precious daughter keeps coming to the door and opening it and asking me if I am okay. Mommy, are you okay??? then she would shorten it to kay mommy?? how pathetic is that?

Now it is one thing to be pulled over for a ticket on a highway where you will know very few people. but it is horrifing to be pulled over in front of your home when your drove less than 3/4 of a mile. and for your children to watch on top of that. Since the lovely day of my ticket I have not been unbuckled while in the car. It was a good lesson for me and one I am sure I will be talking about for along time...but hopefully my daughter will never again have to ask, "are you okay Mommy?? Try not to pee on yourself while reading this story. It's really not that funny!